Guest Blogger: Jaye Wells, Author, Blogger, Debutante

This week Jaye takes over the guest blogging duties with a first sale story that's sure to inspire in its poignancy. Plus, if I may stop to make some fun, doesn't that picture make this post look like an advice column? It screams, "I'm listening, bitch. Whatchoo got?"

Ask Jaye. That might have to become a regular thing. What do you think?

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My first thought when Mark asked me to guest blog here at The League was "Hell, yeah!" Then he mentioned this was humor month, and I thought "Uh oh."

See, as much as I love the funny, when someone tells me to be funny all I hear is, "Dance, monkey, dance!" Thus, I'm sitting here in a tiny red fez. I tried to get my husband to wear a fake mustache and pretend to be an organ grinder, but he responded with something totally inappropriate about grinding organs followed by "that's what she said." So, he's no help.

Anyway...Mark asked me to talk about my first sale. It's one of my favorite topics, to be sure. However, while the story is mildly amusing, the truth is it was one of the most emotional moments of my life. It ranked right up there next to the birth of my spawn and marrying my dirty-minded husband.

So, I tried to think of a way to make my first sale journey more interesting. I decided to go with an interactive approach. Who's ready to play: Guess What Really Happened?

Here's how it works, I'll give a question and you choose the truth from a list of multiple choice options. Easy? We'll see.

1. When my agent called to offer me representation, what did I tell him?
a. Thank you for your interest, but I need to take some time to make this decision.
b. I need to contact the other agents with fulls and get back to you.
c. You're my new best friend!
d. I'm sorry you must have the wrong number.

2. When my agent called with the news we had our first offer, what was my response?
a. Graciously thanking him for his hard work.
b. A dignified little victory dance
c. Screamed "Oh my God!" and burst into tears
d. I accidentally hung up on him

3. Where was I when I got the call?
a. In my office, working away on a manuscript
b. In a bar, doing body shots off a muscle-bound hunk
c. At a play area filled with screaming children
d. In my kitchen, cooking dinner

4. Where was my husband through all this?
a. Right next to me
b. At work
c. In Tokyo, passed out from a Sake marathon
d. At a poker game, gambling away all our money

5. What does the word "auction" mean to me?
a. Sotheby's
b. E-bay
c. Marathon phone tag followed by elation and champagne
d. They never happen for newbie writers

6. What changed in my life after I got the call?
a. Two words: Cabana boy. Two more words: Naked Twister.
b. Suddenly famous, I now have to fend off the paparazzi and wear a pink wig everywhere.
c. Nothing much, except I have a deadline now
d. Due to the pressures of being a "famous author," I now live off a heady cocktail of psychotropic medications

So how do you think you did? If you answered "c" to all of the above, give yourself a cookie. I'd share mine, but I ate them all.

About the book:
Red-Headed Stepchild is about Sabina Kane--half-mage, half-vampire, all attitude. She's an assassin with a heart of brass, who gets herself caught in the middle of feud between the mage and vampire races. Helping Sabina navigate this treacherous world is a high-maintenance hairless cat demon, a prognosticating nymph who used to work in faery porn, and a mysterious mage with an agenda and a nice ass. Red-Headed Stepchild will be released in Spring/Summer 2009 by Orbit US.

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Thanks Jaye, I think I'm jealous of your book (you had me at faery porn). Visit Jaye at her blog, aptly titled Jaye's Blahg.

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