Sunday, August 10, 2008

So Two Leaguers Walk Into a Sushi Place

Note: Some liberties were taken in this article. No names were changed to protect the innocent.

I was in NYC this week for the Backspace Conference, and as luck would have it, I was free on Friday afternoon. So Anton, my fellow League New York member, invited me to lunch.

Really, I should have known something cataclysmic would happen. I mean, the last time a group of Leaguers got together,* men wound up stripping,** women munched muffins*** and Dakota Cassidy lost her voice.**** (Note: League Seattle members getting together doesn't seem to trip the World Catastrophe wire. Maybe it's all the coffee; the wire's too busy vibrating from all the caffeine that it wouldn't notice someone tripping over it, even if acid and The Doors were involved.)

So there we were, first at Anton's day job office (and DROOL, do I LUST him--ah, his office), and he gave me a button that says I PLAY WITH TOYS. And soon, it was time for food. ("Feed me," I told him, "then I'm all yours. As long as I'm back in time for the 2 pm keynote address at the Backspace Conference.") So we decided on Japanese. He took me to this terrific place...er, somewhere in NYC, and we opted to sit outside.

Right, you can see the writing on the wall, can't you?

So we order our food, and I cast mistrustful looks at the chopsticks and pretend I know that the little bowl is to hold soy sauce. Soon enough, the food arrives. Mmmm, delicately fried things. And Anton's raw food stuff. (Seriously: raw fish? Around here, that's called "bait." Just sayin' *****.) My food is spread over two long trays -- part of the "box lunch" offered. And there was the soy sauce bowl (see? I knew that). And my water.

We're getting into it when thunder booms. Anton and I share a look.

ANTON: Uh oh.
ME: That can't be good.

The sky gets Wrath Of God Dark****** and the waiter comes around, gently suggesting we move under the awning. Good idea, Waiter Guy. We move. Anton, sucker--er, gentleman that he is, takes the seat that's closer to the end of the awning. We continue eating.

And then...the rain. Lightning split the skies. Thunder rolled. Other snatches of descriptive song lyrics. Anton put on a brave face, even as the back of his shirt got soaked. The awning over us started dipping perilously low, thanks to all the water collecting in it. Anton decides to move next to me, completely under the awning, but closer to the edge of the awning on the left side. We keep eating.

And then the water all pours off the awning in a small river--over the left edge. Anton, once again, gets soaked.

We finish lunch...and then I have to hightail it back to the Backspace Conference for the keynote. So Anton walked me to Sixth Avenue, showed a little leg, and got me a cab.

All hail Anton, ever the gentleman.

(Crap, I said "hail," didn't I? That doesn't bode well for Dragon*Con, does it, Caitlin?)


* Romantic Times 2008, yo
** Elora's Cavemen, on stage, to music
*** Jacki Frank's Studmuffin Mixer -- corn muffins were quite tasty
**** She says it's from all the talking; that's her story, and she's sticking with it
***** Actually, I think a comedian said it first -- Jeff Foxworthy, maybe?
****** Available at Home Depot and Lowes; looks great on bedroom walls

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Who the HELL Do We Think We Are?

We're a bunch of paranormal romance and urban fantasy authors who occasionally blog, make filthy jokes and prowl the halls of conferences and conventions with switchblades!

Current roster: Mario Acevedo, Michele Bardsley, Sonya Bateman, Dakota Cassidy, Carolyn Crane, Molly Harper, Kevin Hearne, Mark Henry, Stacia Kane, Jackie Kessler, J.F. Lewis, Daniel Marks, Richelle Mead, Kelly Meding, Allison Pang, Nicole Peeler, Kat Richardson, Michelle Rowen, Diana Rowland, Jeanne C. Stein, K.A. Stewart, Anton Strout, and Jaye Wells

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