Constructive Construction

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I think I have solved the dammit-I-hate-road-construction crisis that faces every one of us when we hit the highways each summer. Here's my idea.

As soon as you reach a construction zone, a computer inside your car is activated by a beacon beside the road. All driving responsibilities go to auto-pilot. At which point laser guns emerge from compartments hidden in the vehicle. You and any passengers then attempt to shoot targets, which double as the reflectors that stick out of the top of the barrels that mark where you can and cannot drive in construction lanes. If you hit a target, something neat pops out of the top of the barrel. A clown, maybe, or a bank robber with his hands in the air, signaling surrender. At the end of the construction zone, scores are tallied, and whoever wins on the day gets a free tank of gas. Cool?

If you could, how would you completely alter your driving experience?

Comments

Anonymous said…
Oh, I'd so love driving through construction if it turned into a shooting gallery - would have made life where I grew up that much more interesting (although, there was that one construction stretch that had signs turning a frowny face into a smiley face as you went through the six miles of one-lane traffic).

I think I'd prefer autopilot driving in total for the trip - less aggravation on the roads, and if we could have a free wifi/wimax antenna on the top of the car to pull in signal, I think most of us would return to enjoying the drive.
May 27, 2009 at 9:43 AM
Jackie M (Literary Escapism) said…
But wouldn't that mean they would need more orange cones since everyone would be aiming at them and there wouldn't be many to hit? My husband would love that though, but something tells me he would aim at the other cars more than the orange barrels. :P
May 27, 2009 at 10:01 AM
Thom said…
There was a science fiction short story I remember from a long time ago (early 1980's or so, IIRC) where cars were built to battle each other, but the cool thing I remember from it was that all cars had the capacity to display scrolling phrases across their back window.

So you'd have people driving around with "Learn to drive, a-hole" or "Turn your damn high beams off" on the back of their cars.

That could be anmusing. It would also probably increase the road rage to Mad max levels, but it would still be amusing.
May 27, 2009 at 11:00 AM
Pat said…
My driving experience is much better, now that I no longer use the freeways. Perfect.
May 27, 2009 at 11:15 AM
Nicole Peeler said…
I would move back to a city and not drive. HATE DRIVING. Hate it. Miss walking! But do love listening to satellite radio. That has changed everything, making driving almost palatable.
May 27, 2009 at 12:38 PM
Vickie said…
Fly in my car up and over the construction areas and the McCrappee drivers....just hit AutoPilotUp and off we'd go.....
May 27, 2009 at 1:31 PM
Jennifer Rardin said…
Oh, Vickie! I would so buy a Jetson's car that could fold up into my briefcase! Stellar!!!
May 27, 2009 at 2:13 PM
Falcata Times said…
Yeah a car you can put in your pocket would be cool. Other than that I think something that would do all the work with the comfort a bed for you to sleep in along with a games console would be pretty neat.
May 27, 2009 at 2:18 PM
Vickie said…
Jennifer: Yep, I had the Jetson's theme song going in my cranium when I read this blog post. = )
May 27, 2009 at 2:48 PM
Anonymous said…
I know what would improve my driving experience...if a really hot woman was my chauffeur. Oh yeah, I'm a dog.

I wonder if Megan Fox is available?
May 27, 2009 at 4:55 PM
GB said…
Having real guns on the outside of my car to ... persuade ... other drivers to get out of my way when I have somewhere to be. So, instead of saying "GunsGunsGuns" whenever an idiot maybe wants to turn here, no, turn there, hang on wait, I meant turn here four kilometers down the road with their blinker on the whole way, I'll have real ones to make sure they better understand that indecision can cause accidents just as easily as inattention and speeding.

Me, a menace on the roads? Never. But I will take this moment to point out that Mad Max was made in Australia...
May 27, 2009 at 6:40 PM
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