Wednesday, February 18, 2009

Vamp Pride

There's trouble brewing among the undead, people.

Surely you're aware that the current mainstream popularity of vampire lore had spawned a new generation of wannabe vampires. You know the type. They wear lots of black, think they discovered Bauhaus and demand their parents now call them "Raven" or "Morpheus." Although, I guess these days they're going by "Bella" and "Edward." Back in the eighties, we called these kids Goths. In the nineties, we had the emos. And now, in the naughties, we've got the Twibiters (trademarked, bitches!).

Anyway, the real vampires are pissed. They're not going to stand for these tween bloodsuckers co-opting their lifestyle anymore.

I don't know about you, but I'm thinking the next obvious step is Vamp Pride Day. It's time for real vampires to come out of the coffin and demand their rights. I can already see the flag- a black bat on a field of red. Vampires of the world unite!

Obviously, our fanged friends will need a catchy slogan to shout at their parade. What should it be? Hmm?

16 comments:

JD said...

"We really suck"?

Vampy Nurse said...

Hmmm... let me see, though I agree that this whole Twilight/Vamps thing is completely outta control, I don't know who is more ridiculous ; The Twibiters, or these other people who actualy believe they are vampires.... AND actualy drink blood!
I'm just sayinn'.... in my opinion, it just sounds very stupid, and bottom line....That shit's just NOT safe!

Jo said...

I think, in the partial episode of Mad House (a cancelled SciFi reality show) that I saw the "real" vampire (and contestants) had to follow some health code stuff to neutralize any safety issues. I don't remember any details though.

As for the Vamp Pride Day slogan...sorry I'm blanking. But I'll second JD's slogan idea...

Jo said...

Oops. It was actually called Mad mad House (wikipedia entry: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mad_Mad_House)

Molly Harper said...

In my books, the Vamp Pride rallying cry is:

"We're here, sunlight we fear, get used to it."

Vickie said...

"Take Back the Bite!"

Jackie Ballway said...

Wasn't this an episode of South Park? The goth kids were pissed because the emo kids were taking over Denny's or something.

And I back Vickie's slogan 100%! Sent coffee shooting straight out of my nose onto the keyboard. Luckily everyone is at lunch, so there weren't any witnesses.

Jennifer Rardin said...

It's About Bloody Time! (British accent optional)

Kat Richardson said...

I have a soft spot for "We Suck--but only if you ask nicely."

Michelle said...

I think all the puns on "suck" have been made already and a slogan really should include this word:)

In any case, I'm all for a Vamp Pride Day. Call me in!

Thom said...

"Say it loud! We're dead and we're proud!"

"When vampires become trendy, only trendoids will be vampires"

"We're dead, blood's red, get used to it!"

"What do we want? -Blood!"
"When do we want it? - Between sunset and sunrise!"

and of course...

"Take back the night!"

alanajoli said...

I'm hearing an Avenue Q style rendition of "It sucks to be us..."

(Twibiters! That's so brilliant!)

silveradept said...

Mmm. Vamp Pride Night, I suspect. And the best slogan I can think of is "Proud to be a bloodsucking vamp." or something equally playful.

tom-gallier said...

Yes. Vamp Pride Day only has the "sparkly" vamps. The REAL vamps go out to play at night.

So, Vamp Pride NIGHT.

How about, We Own the Night! Join us for a Bite.

blackroze37yahoo.com said...

well they need to make a fuss about dental insurance

blackroze37yahoo.com said...

we're fanged, but ask nicely and we will bang"

i know im a perv



let's rock the vamp vote

we will suck your blood, better than the govt will

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